Wildness

I had never seen them so turbulent.
Rythm broken, crashing violently before they ever neared the shore.
The only certainty - wildness and overwhelming power.

I was drawn by their terror and magnificence.
I stood in awe and understood what it meant to be tossed and consumed by them.
To be in them would to be lost, and a mighty hand the only hope.

Glacial Point

I stood in the valley and looked up at the peak. "We are going to climb that?" It seemed a little absurd. The view from the valley was beautiful, how different could it be from the top? We started the ascent with breathing already slightly labored. We were thousands of feet higher than we were that morning and we had 3,220' more to go on foot.

The path took us back and forth up the side of the mountain. Huge boulders from a long ago rock slide covered in bright green moss, brilliant orange autumn leaves scattered, layered and surrounding the trail. A trickling stream in our path. I wonder how people get past it in the spring. A light layer of snow covered our path as we neared the top.

The view surrounding us remained the same, but with every turn and increase in elevation the perspective changed. What once was a lone peak became one of three in a descending series. What was a massive shear wall became the base for rolling hills. The light changed revealing textures not noticed before.

Fifteen minutes from the top, our steps quickened even as our legs protested. The last 50 feet we ran, in both joy and relief. I wish I could say the top was all that. The vista was breathtaking to be sure, but not more magnificent than all I had seen on the climb...

A hand on my back

I had just accepted my last dance for the evening. I was on some sort of high (or perhaps just dizzy from all the turning), but my feet were tired and didn't know what to do anymore.
He had come, taken my hands and led me on the dance floor with his eyes fixed on mine.
As I tried to understand & match his fluid rythmn, I stumbled more and more. I was a little embarrassed, he was a peer, taller than me (the first!) and he knew what he was doing.

"If you make a mistake, I notice and it is my responsibility to correct it, so don't try to correct yourself, just keep dancing" Those were his words to me, gentle not condemning. I wondered why I thought it was up to me.

I paused for a second and asked him how to follow his lead, what I should pay attention to.
"Feel my hand on your back. Let it turn your hip and shoulder. Let it lead you."
I leaned back and rested in his arm, until I could feel even the slightest change in pressure in his hand. "Yes, just like that" My body started to move with his, turning on his cue.

"It's impossible to make mistakes in social dancing, just have fun"
We moved across the floor slowly, I started to get use to his hand. The music stopped, I asked him for another song. We continued, and I began to move in ways I had not been taught.

I was delighted and grateful for the time he gave. His five years of dancing to my few lessons and one evening. He may have been relieved to move on and dance with those whose experience matched his, but perhaps on another evening he will ask again.

......................................
I'm learning to follow
I'm learning to let go
I'm learning to move with the music
I'm learning to give up control
......................................

how wonderful it is to be a woman

wierd dream

The water was beyond murky. I only call it water because what I was in was in liquid form and it came up to my waist. Sludge might be a better word. Creatures lurked beneath. None touched me, but I soon caught a glimpse of one that was headed my way.

I stepped behind the man at my side, confident he knew the waters and could keep me safe.
I walked with him through the filth, and saw the fate of others who had perished here. It was not a pretty site. As I climbed up out at the edge of the filth, I watched as the other two in our group tried to safely navigate their way out.

amused

I had a funny thought this morning. My foundations are totally being shaken. I mean that was the word that prompted me to move to San Francisco - Lord shake & destroy my foundations. And it is totally happening. Is it just coincidence that the city I moved to just happens to be so close to a fault line? Ha! I have even wondered if there would be an earthquake while I was here - guess so.

waves

I emerged coughing, spitting, and gasping for breath, overwhelmed by the latest wave.
All I had thought was "I'm going to die. I have to get out"

I stood on the shores, dripping wet and free
I breathed in the beauty, the waves were glorious and shining in the sun, and the roar could be heard from miles away.
I could have stayed on the shores forever or simply walk away, but something deep inside told me I was to go back in.
To not give up.

Immersed in the waves, I can't see the glimmers of the sun,
but as I collapse on my knees, I hope this is where healing is found.

much ado

Well I can now say I've been within 30 feet of royalty. That is if you include the brief moment when Prince Charles and Camilla drove past with their entourage. My friend and I caught a brief glimpse of them when they posed for the media for a minute before heading inside the "Beach Blanket Babylon" theatre to take in the musical parody.

My friend lives around the corner from the theatre, and so throughout the day we checked to see when the crowd would gather and walked down for one or two false alarms. I hoped for a good picture, but I think it was too dark.

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2005/11/07/MNGH0FK7641.DTL

pursuit

My worst nightmare has become reality,
Like a scene right out of my own personal hell
I twist, I turn, but there is no where to go
Except to follow the pain into the darkness & depths of my soul

Taken to a room with old wounds reopened and fresh ones digging in deep
I ask, God why have you done this to me, how can you be so cruel?
Maybe this is where healing happens, how I don't really know
Perhaps there is even beauty in here that was hid so long ago.

I am spent, I am done.
Not a queen, I am a peasant girl who longs for the beauty of love.